Why we do what we do

Running running I’m running towards something don’t know what it is never know only know that I have to run must get there as fast as possible otherwise something bad will happen don’t know what but something bad all I know is that I must run follow the trail patter antennae on the ground and follow the trail painted gold on the floor by some anonymous sister as fast as I can to get to the fruit or the sugar or the caterpillar or whatever else it is one of the scouts has found don’t know what it is doesn’t matter just get there quick get there quick scamper round the rock over the twigs dance across the waxy leaf don’t look left don’t look right then there it is a massive peach bruised and soft and smelling of nectar even at this distance covered in a twitching black mosaic of ants and I run with them alongside them tap antennae briefly but don’t waste time with pleasantries no time for that never time for that then scale that enormous golden north face find a seam and start digging chew the flesh nibble nibble chew it into a manageable transportable lump golden juices dribbling over shiny black thorax over shiny black head into shiny black mouth and now it hits liquid sugar explosion inside my brain and it tastes so sweet feels so good and a thought slips inside my head uninvited and makes me wonder why it is that I’m running all day doing this when I could just sit here and drink sugar-water

I could just stay here, I could just stay here. Roll the thought around a few times; I could just stay here. I don’t have to go back. I could stay here and drink the sugar-water, stay here and relax. I could just stay, I could

now I remember why I’m doing this I’m doing it because I have to shouldn’t have had those kinds of thoughts mustn’t have those kinds of thoughts again mustn’t stop mustn’t slow down they need me they all need me to keep going if I didn’t who knows what would happen pick up the lump of peach can’t stop can’t rest patter antennae can’t just go off and do whatever I want to run back along the trail quick quick I’m part of the community and the community is more important than me more important than me more important than me