Stones

Ecks has just started to do a weekly 300-word writing challenge with a friend. Last week's suggested title was "Stones".

My garden’s covered in half-stones and I’m still poor.

Let me explain:

One day I happened to drop a stone in my garden, and it split in two. Nothing unusual about that, you might think, and you’d be right. But inside the stone, perfectly still, was half a toad. Or, as I soon discovered, a whole toad, of which only half was showing (the front half, in case you were wondering).

I was amazed – who wouldn’t be? – but I was even more shocked when it blinked and proceeded to wriggle free. I had to sit down. My head swam. Darwin, I thought. Creation, I thought. A new widescreen TV, I thought.

Come and see the amazing toad that lived in a stone, I said, witness the miracle for yourself, just five pounds, I said, and they came and queued up around the block for a glimpse. The first man to see it said is that it, and I told him yes it was, but he didn’t seem very impressed. Worst five pounds I ever spent, he said as he left. The next man asked if it went back into the stone, maybe at night, to sleep, but I had to tell him that no, it didn’t, and he said it looked just like a normal toad if truth be told. The third man said that I could have just found any old toad and plonked it in a case next to a broken stone, and could he have his money back please.

So, I thought, is there another toad in another of the stones in my garden?

You want to know the answer?

Like I said, my garden’s covered in half-stones and I’m still poor.

Find out who you should vote for on May the 5th.