Simile Dickinson

Ecks was helping his neighbour, retired lepidopterist Bombay Louis Harcourt, to haul his freshly sedated pygmy hippopotamus into the back of the borrowed hearse for transportation to the vet, when Bombay Louis commented that the animal was as heavy as Led Zeppelin wearing lead boots on Boxing Day. This prompted Ecks to wonder what his favourite similes were; he came up with the following:

As ugly as a box of frogs
As low as a snake's belly in a wagon rut
A face like a bag of spanners

A meagre list. Can you add to it?